Birth Story: How Music and an Empowered Mindset Created a Positive Birth Experience with Patricia Allison
Show Notes:
[1:56] Our Reviewer of the Week, LMPfromMI, said: "I wanted to reach out and personally thank you for all of the work that you put into your web course and podcast. I listened to your podcast every day throughout my recent pregnancy and I know that it made a significant difference in my pregnancy and labor. I am a first time mama and got to have the home birth of my dreams next to my husband, mom (and doula) and midwife. Throughout my first trimester, I was so anxious about labor and delivery and was so uneducated in all aspects of birth. Thanks to your podcast, not only was I empowered to have my baby at home, but it was unmedicated too! And despite complications and almost needing to transfer to hospital, I had so much peace and confidence throughout every contraction. My whole labor was only 9 hours, with pushing for just over one hour. My midwife said if baby hadn’t been in a posterior position, she would have missed my birth! I know not everyone gets to have a birth like this, but I know my experience is thanks to the preparations I made from listening to your online course and podcast. Thank you!"
[3:15] Today's birth story guest is a My Essential Birth Student and podcast listener! Patricia and her husband live in West Virginia, where she is a music therapist. She is the mama to a baby boy!
[3:58] Tell us a little bit about your pregnancy. Was it pretty straightforward? Did you have any weird symptoms or things like that? Throughout your pregnancy, did you come up to any testing that was weird? Did you change providers? Anything like that? Patricia and her husband did IVF to conceive. Once they got past that part of their journey, her pregnancy was normal. She only got sick once or twice and did not have any weird cravings. She ended up having a succenturiate lobe, which was a blood vessel attached to the placenta. Concerns included an increased risk of hemorrhaging because the blood vessels could burst while pushing. She lived in a rural area so the hospital that was equipped to handle something like that was 25 minutes away.
[7:12] What made you decide to do a home birth? Patricia wanted a home birth due to her distrust of the medical system. Her mom is an ER Nurse so her daughter's choice to have a home birth was difficult for her. Because she and her husband did IVF and have a limited number of opportunities to have kids in the future, she decided that if she wanted to do it, she could do it now. Her home is her safe space, and she really felt confident in, her ability to navigate labor, especially with her partner and having her mom present at the birth with her training.
[9:21] Regarding providers, is there just one midwife in your area? Were they recommended to you? Did you seek them out? What was that experience like for you? Did you interview a few? Patricia did a Google search for midwives in West Virginia, and she came upon a website that had a list of some of them, but not many were in her area. The midwife that they chose has actually been on the My Essential Birth podcast! She didn't really interview others because Maureen fit the vibe she was going for and was a lovely midwife. She continued with traditional OB care at the request of her mom. In West Virginia, the university hospital over in Morgantown pretty much owns all of the hospitals in the area. If you go to one, it's the same policies and procedures at the other. She ended up switching to a doctor because she found out that the midwives at the hospitals can't deliver babies anymore. They're not allowed due to insurance billing.
[17:30] Tell me about your birth partner. How was he feeling through all of this and how did you guys prepare together for having a home birth? Patricia's husband was very go with the flow and supportive of her desire to have a home birth. He gave her the space to explore things that she wanted out of the labor, and he really just was along for the ride. He would do anything she asked in regards to preparation and loved the birth course. They practiced different positions and counter pressure. He was actually gone for the last almost two months of her pregnancy due to officer candidate school in Alabama. They would put music on and relax together. They would get the ball out and practice counter pressure on the ball. She didn't really expect for him to have as much of a hands on role due to the rest of her birth team's experience, but she wanted to connect together.
[20:26] Talk to me about your preparation because it sounds like you did a lot of preparing and may or may not have used what you prepped for. What were the things that you found that were really helpful for you (things that you listened to or did every day, physical, emotional, mental work)? What is something you did to prepare that other women may latch on to? When Patricia was in school for music therapy, she did a training course for music therapy assisted child labor. Music was a very, very big part of her preparation and her labor. The playlists that she used are research backed in supporting the different stages of labor. She would pick a playlist and kind of match it to the preparation she wanted to do for that evening. For example: if she was in the bathtub, she would choose meditation music. If she was doing yoga, she would maybe do relaxation that was a little bit more upbeat, not quite meditative, but still relaxing. If she was moving on the ball, she would choose something that had a little bit more of an imagery backing to it. She also did the three daily exercises.
She also did some coloring for some cards which got her into that headspace and practice these mantras as I was coloring them. In the summer, she bought an inflatable pool, put it outside, sat in that, and listened to her meditation music a lot.
[23:50] Was there anything that you did for your body as you were getting closer to labor? Anything that your midwife recommended or things that you had used like red raspberry tea or evening primrose oil or anything to prep your body for labor? Patricia did the red raspberry leaf tea pretty much from 32 weeks on and drank it 2-3 times a day. She ate dates every day and also tried to eat a lot of protein.
[24:58] Patricia shares her birth story:
- Her water broke at night but her contractions faded by the morning even though she had leakage.
- By the next evening, her midwife came over and gave her tinctures to get her labor going.
- She got in the tub once her contractions didn't ease up.
- She couldn't get comfortable and counter pressure didn't work.
- She made the choice to transfer to the hospital because she was still at 4 cm after her water breaking 26 hours before.
- Once she got to the hospital, she was 5 cm and asked for minimal monitoring.
- She ended up getting an epidural and Pitocin.
- She was in labor for about 40 hours when her son was finally born.
- She was able to catch him.
[50:39] What is your best advice for moms and dads?
"For dad, I would say: follow her lead and be prepared to take it if you need to. If she needs you to be that person that's rallying for her, be that person, but then also, be mindful of where you're at within her space and just follow her lead. My husband was wonderful about just being my partner there.
For moms, I have this little nugget of wisdom that isn't necessarily strictly for birth, but it helped me with my transition and in processing my labor as a whole. It was given to me by one of my professors when I was in school. And it's just a little quote. It says, 'Blessed are the flexible for they never get bent out of shape.' And this is a phrase that I really try to live by everywhere in my life is to just be flexible in my decisions and things like that, but especially in labor. I had the plan and I don't regret making the plan at all. But I think my grace and my ability to maintain flexibility is what allowed me to still have such a positive experience, even though it wasn't exactly what I wanted because now my baby is here and he's healthy, and we had a good experience and everybody's happy, and I think, it was just a testament to being able to stay flexible in the moment and not seeing change as a reflection of a failure or unpreparedness on your part."
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